TELL ME WHO I AM

Can you tell me who I am,
Can you tell me where I've been,
Can you tell what I did a week ago?
I can't remember who I am.

Can you tell me who I am
Can you tell me why I'm here,
Can you tell me what is going on?
I can't remember who I am.

Can you tell me how I know,
Can you tell me who you are,
Can you tell me why I see their faces before me?
I can't remember who I am.

Can you tell me who I am,
Can you tell me where I've been,
Can you tell what I did a week ago?
I can't remember who I am.

Do you know who I am?
Who am I?

Fantasy

A million shining pieces of my shattered, broken mind
Are sharp and shard-like piercing into my fragile bind
Hopes and dreams lie scattered, strewn upon the floor
Slipping through my fingers when I try to hold them more

Here we are here we stand
Clinging to fantasy
Look over the horizon at the ever nearing sea
They can catch me hold me chain me
Kill and rape and tear and maim me
They won’t steal my fantasy

I’ve been standing here forever on the border of denial
Warding off their questions with a tired, faltering smile
I sing in self-condolence of other worlds that for me pray
But my shell is slowly chipping with each untruth that I say

Here we are here we stand
Clinging to fantasy
Look over the horizon at the ever nearing sea
They can catch me hold me chain me
Kill and rape and tear and maim me
They won’t steal my fantasy…

Reason

He would be sure to remember
I was blind when we met...
the taste of saline on my lips,
and all the words I spoke were sterile,
but if you asked me then, I would say
I met no one there.

Sometimes when I exhale now
a minute requiem escapes. One low note
like the dried blood on my sheets.
You would know me if you saw me
I think... because I am sad,
the kind that makes me lazy like he hates,
but when I sleep, I walk
in the country of nightmares
where the silence is louder than his pulse.

What I wished three days ago
was for him to break the night with color.
The winter shades of pale grey.
I know I would see them now,
but he remembered I was blind and brought
me lullabies instead.

EYES TO PARADISE

You're a boy with two eyes; i'm
a girl with one heart and i say love
is blind but you
say love can see everything.

i'm a liar with two tongues; you're
honesty if honesty was silent. but
silence is louder in your hands.

in your hands i am silent.

we sleep with both eyes
open; but we're not sleeping,
we're not sleeping. we're wide
awake and it's time to go
to sleep.

if empty is a beating drum
then you're a slap to a face that
we haven't seen and doesn't
exsist; but you're innocent still.

innocence is bliss when ignorance is knowledge.

i'm just waiting; for the rapture,
but it seems my lungs are empty and
my hands
are heavy and weak.

heavy and weak; heavy and weak.

we sleep with both eyes
open; but we're not sleeping,
we're not sleeping. we're wide
awake and it's time to go
to sleep. so wake up.

wake up.

we have two lungs and two
ears and two feet and
two hearts between us and
we're stuck here.

we're stuck here; we're waiting for release.

i'm asleep.
i'm asleep.
i'm awake.

i do not exist.
i do not exist.
i do not exist.
i do not exist.
i do not exist.
i do not exist.
i do not exist.
i do not exist.
i do not exist.

EMBRACE

The bitterness of tears the gripping scent of dispair
These are things that never leave me, they are always there
I'm always beginning, never arriving
I can't go on denying

My feelings for you are strong
No matter if it's right or wrong
It doesn't matter just as long
As we're together

I want you to realize
The feelings you have behind your eyes
Don't ignore them and sigh
It's so hard to live a lie

Be true to yourself and me
Be true to the feeling we cannot see
We can't fight fate or destiny
Embrace the reality

I want your body, I want your soul
I want to have your love flow
Flow all over me
Like the waves of the sea

Accept it, accept me
Embrace the reality
It doesn't matter if it's right or wrong
As long as we can sing this song

ALL ON YOU

I wonder what it feels like
To feel so locked up.
When you can't even feel me,
When you can't fall in love.

I think about you all the time,
But I'm sorry that you can't
Can you even hear me?
Don't you understand...

...That you're my dream,
You're my rock that I can fall on.
You're so wonderful, baby come on
You can break free from that cell
I know you can escape your hell,
It's all on you.

I love the way you think,
But they're thoughts that are secret.
I'm here for you
Even when I'm not needed.

Of all the things
Going on around you.
I'll be there,
Yes, it's true...

...That you're my dream,
You're my rock that I can fall on.
You're so wonderful, baby come on
You can break free from that cell
I know you can escape your hell,
It's all on you.

Please don't fade away,
I know you can break free.
I wouldn't know what to do if you're gone,
I'd die, indeed...


...You're my dream,
You're my rock that I can fall on.
You're so wonderful, baby come on
You can break free from that cell
I know you can escape your hell,
It's all on you.

It's all on you
It's all on you
It's all on you.

BREATHE

I'm lying here,
trying to breathe.
You left last night,
it's something
I still can't believe.
You said goodbye,
and you didn't know,
I was trying hard not to cry.

And I'd wake up,
to the thought
that you were never coming back...

That you were never coming back.

And it's so hard to breathe,
whenever you're here
and whenever you're gone.
But you don't even know
that you do this to me.
How it scares me that
you're happy,
when I feel like I'm alone.

So I hear you're happy
over there,
And I guess I'm just
holding back the tears,
just so you wouldn't see.
I know I'm not
supposed to feel
like you belong with me.
I know that it's wrong,
I know that it's selfish.
To wish that you and I
would just be...

And it's so hard to breathe,
whenever you're here
and whenever you're gone.
But you don't even know
that you do this to me.
How it scares me that
you're happy,
when I feel like I'm alone.

I try to take a step back,
get you out of my mind.
How the hell can I do that,
while you're still in my life.
And you're not even aware,
you're happy with those other girls,
it's as if you never even cared...
about the girl that always used to be there.

You've fallen in love,
with someone else.
And you don't know that it kills me
to have to wish you two
all the best.
I guess it's sort of my fault,
but I can help but wish...
that you would think of me too.
The way that I think about you...

And it's so hard to breathe,
whenever you're here
and whenever you're gone.
But you don't even know
that you do this to me.
How it scares me that
you're happy,
when I feel like I'm alone.

It's so hard to breathe,
whenever you're here.
Whenever you're gone.

YOU ARE DEAD

We keep ourselves under the stars
We hide all the evil scars
But there is nothing that can be done.

We are hurt with all the wars
And now it is a bore
To see nothing at all that is won.

You hurt me
And you see
No pain that has been dealt

Believe me!
When we
Are under every spell

That is when you can say
You are dead.

These feelings I have never shown
But all this time I have known
You’re not worth it.

Yet again I will fight for you
Knowing there’s nothing I can do
It’s destroying me!

When death is around the corner
When there is only boredom
You know that I will fight

To stay alive!
Live or lie!
That is when

You can say
You are dead.

That is when you can say you are dead.

TORN DOWN THE MIDDLE

Try what you want
But my heart still feels broken
Say what you need
It falls on deaf ears

Illusions of love, aspiring
Delusions, enough, I'm tiring
It brings me to my knees

I'm torn down the middle
Losing my mind
While my trust has faded
Crumbling to the floor
Just stop, say no more
What's happening to me?
I hate it.

Touch, if you dare
But my skin has knumbed
Look into my eyes
To see I've gone blind

Illusions of love, aspiring
Delusions, enough, I'm tiring
It brings me to my knees
How dare you bring me to my knees

I'm torn down the middle
Losing my mind
While my trust has faded
Falling to the floor
Just stop, say no more
What's happening to me?
I hate it.

So tug one more time
You'll find that I tear
Any more pressure
And I might explode

What have you done to me?
I hate it ...

FROZEN FIRE

We decrease the temperature
about 2 degrees
Do you feel the burning cold
of all the stories left untold?

My heart is just a synonym
my heart is all blindfold
And I had to remember
all those things that you had sold

Feel it
Catch it
Tell me right away
what you have left behind
Time to go, time to go, time to go
time to be one of a kind

I feel this feeling will not feel
hit the moment, strike my time
And be the right one on my lifeline
just keep my eye glued to the sky

Increase the temperature again
and make my synonym stop shivering
Now, do you feel the freezing heat
that melts my life down to your feet?

Feel it
Catch it
Break my day
Feel it
Catch it, please
....stay

Hopeless Romantic

Am I hoplessly romantic, or am I just hopless for you?
From the west to the atlantic, I'm hoplessly searching for proof
that there's hope for me somewhere, somewhere there's a chance
that this glance that we keep throwing will turn out to be more than just a glance

'Cause
I want to live a life worth living,
but hearts weren't made to be forgiving,
and it's strife to go through with all this pain
I can't stand being alone without you
and yet I feel alone beside you too
I feel like i'll never live that way again

So tell me, what is it you're thinking
when you go home and when your wishing, do you wish for me?
tell me, what you're really feeling
and is it so, just so appealing
that I'd want to feel it, too
I can get you off my mind
You could at least say you tried
Tried to make this work and maybe,
if you really love me baby,
we could make it work this time

Do I want to be romantic, or should I just be blunt and skip the lines?
'cause boy, you've got me frantic and I'm running all around asking you why
we couldn't make this better, we could of made this better if we'd wanted
It's a little late now, now my empty heart is being haunted
by
ghosts of all our former selves
saying, "God, it feels like hell,
could anyone make this poor girl heal?"
Their voices echo off the hollow walls
No one can hear my crying calls
It's finally sinking in: my fate's for real

So tell me, what is it you're thinking
when you go home and when your wishing, do you wish for me?
tell me, what you're really feeling
and is it so, just so appealing
that I'd want to feel it, too
I can get you off my mind
You could at least say you tried
Tried to make this work and maybe,
if you really love me baby,
we could make it work this time

And do I want to have your hand
inside my own?
Do I want to have you and
no longer be alone?
Are you big enough to fill the space?
Strong enough to fix this place,
and though I long for you embrace,
I can't stand the thought of your empty face

And do I want to have your hand
inside my own?
Do I want to have you and
no longer be alone?
Are you big enough to fill the space?
Strong enough to fix this place,
and though I long for you embrace,
the hole you left can't be replaced...


Tell me, what is it you're thinking
when you go home and when your wishing, do you wish for me?
tell me what your really feeling (tell me, tell me)
and is it so, just so appealing (appealing)
that i'd want to feel it too

So tell me, what is it you're thinking
when you go home and when your wishing, do you wish for me?
tell me, what you're really feeling
and is it so, just so appealing
that I'd want to feel it, too
I can get you off my mind
You could at least say you tried
Tried to make this work and maybe,
if you really love me baby,
we could make it work this time
We could make it work this time.
We could make it work this time.

Unless You've become

I know that you're trying to make me think that I was wrong to stay
When you know that I'm trying so hard for us to be okay
You think it's so easy to make me go away
Well listen up 'cause I'm tired of telling you to your face

This is the last time I'm gonna say

unless you can keep me from smiling
unless you can keep me from breathing
unless you can keep me from dying

I know with you is where I belong

I'm not going to leave you
because of the rumors
I'm not going to leave you
because of the lying
I'm not going to leave you
because of the fighting

I'm gonna stand right here beside you
until I know that when I leave
You've become a different man
from the one I know today

So shut up and sit down boy
because I'm through with you acting like you know what's best for me
Don't give me that excuse about not loving me,
when every time I tell you to go you say 'quit playin'
just like you know there's no way for you to watch me leave

I know deep in my heart there's no way I'll go

unless you can keep me from blushing
unless you can keep me from laughing
unless you can keep me from counting every second that we're apart

I'm not going to leave you
because of the rumors
I'm not going to leave you
because of the lying
I'm not going to leave you
because of the fighting

I'm gonna stand right here beside you
until I know that when I leave
You've become a different man
from the one I know today

So unless you're ready to make me live with a broken heart
I'm right here to stay

unless you can keep me from smiling
unless you can keep me from breathing
unless you can keep me from dying
from laughing
from blushing
from counting every second that we're apart

I'm not going to leave you
because of the rumors
I'm not going to leave you
because of the lying
I'm not going to leave you
because of the fighting

unless you've become a different man
from the one I know

Time To see

Come to the time
When you'll realize
I was there all the while
Only to guide you

When you take me on
I get a little cold
Maybe some things aren't meant to be

Maybe one day
You'll look to the sky
And see the things you left behind

But now you know
How to get along
You don't need me to rely on

When you talk to me
I always make a scene
Just to make another memory

Pheraps one day you'll see
All you really need
Is someone who means more than a shield

I look to the moon
To see how soon
I need to look once more upon you

Maybe you'll look to the stars
And think of me wherever you are

Maybe through the trees
You'll get a little beam
Of the moonlight you look to guide you

I'll sit alone
To just get a little on
This rollercoaster we call life

Music Is the way out

So YAY.. Finally my first single "running for something" now available on iTunes.
I might Be not that Famous. But I don't care...
I just want to Play my song, Play My music, and I will keep writing and making music.
Screw famous,I just want my music to be known by a musician who knows what music is all about.

and also, thanks to all my friends for the love and supports.
really appreciate it.

Living This Live

Id rather die on my feet than live on my knees. So you can watch me rise with the things we carry. The loss. The scars. The weight of heavy hearts. So I say to the slaves of depression : carry on. And sing the sweet redeeming song. About living this life free and long. Watch me. Watch me. Watch. Me. Rise.

There's always Hope

From what I've been troughout, I've learned Don't try to understand everything. Because sometimes it is not meant to be understood. But rather to be accepted.
I believe that Faith means believing the unbelievable. Hope means hoping when everything seems hopeless.

I don't know, maybe my middle name is "hope"
And maybe I was born to be a dreamer.
I won't change it, because I dream and I believe like a kid. I won't grow up. I just learn to behave in public.
And I will Do anything To make my dreams Come true.
Anything in a good possible way.

I am strong because I know my weaknesses. I'm alive because I'm a fighter.I am wise because I've been foolish. I laugh because I've known sadness.

Where there is hope and determination, a solution is not far behind.

God has to break you in order to build you.

I wrote this to the guy who loves COLDPLAY

Don’t Panic when you read this.
Whenever I see you,
you make me Shiver,
and my heart? beats faster
than the Speed Of Sound.
I wish I could just go Talk to you.
I’m not looking for Trouble,
and I’m not The Scientist,
but to me,
Every Teardrop from your eyes? Is A Waterfall
to me, and if you get hurt,
I’ll do whatever to Fix You.
I hope to See You Soon,
because you make me Viva La Vida.

Thom Yorke

Buat saya, Thom yorke adalah musisi yang otak nya di atas rata-rata.
saya menggilai Radiohead sejak tahun 90'an,hingga sekarang.

Radiohead, menjadi salah satu band terbesar abad ke-21. Rilis single pertama mereka, "Creep", pada tahun 1992. Lagu yang pada awalnya berhasil dengan menjadi hit di seluruh dunia hingga beberapa bulan setelah peluncuran album debut mereka, Pablo Honey (1993). Ketenaran Radiohead naik di Inggris Raya dengan merilis album kedua mereka, The Bends (1995), album ketiga Radiohead, OK Computer (1997), mendorong mereka untuk ketenaran internasional yang lebih besar. Radiohead yang sering mengusung penampilan suara yang luas dan tema-tema keterasingan modern, seperti di albumnya "OK Computer" yang menjadi sejarah tersendiri di tahun 1990-an.


Bicara Radiohead tak lekang dari peran front-liner Thom Yorke sang vokalis yang melakukan karir menantang dan tak terduga dalam sebuah perubahan musik. Lahir 7 Oktober 1968, di Wellingborough, Inggris, Yorke lahir dengan penyakit pada mata kirinya dan mengakibatkan kelumpuhan hingga matanya tertutup sebelah sampai usia enam tahun. Ia menjalani lima kali operasi total, operasi terakhir itu gagal dan ia hampir kehilangan penglihatan semua. Bahkan hampir setahun ia tidak bisa melihat, dan jika ia pergi harus menggunakan pelindung mata.


Sejak remaja ia telah menyukai musik, sebagai inspirasinya, antara lain Elvis Costello, Queen, danThe Beatles. Setelah keluarganya akhirnya menetap di Oxford, Yorke disekolahkan hingga bertemu Ed O'Brien (Gitaris Radiohead) dan Colin Greenwood (Bassist Radiohead). Dari bandnya yang terinspirasi oleh R.E.M dan The Smiths hingga mereka menemukan Phil Selway sebagai drummer,dan mengundang adik Colin Greenwood yang memiliki multi-instrumen Jonny Greenwood untuk bergabung.
kembali ke vokalis yang memiliki nama asli Thomas Edward Yorke, adalah musisi Inggris yang merupakan vokalis sekaligus penulis lagu dari band Radiohead. Yorke yang ayahnya seorang sales alat kimia juga pernah membuat debut album solo yang bertajuk The Eraser. Yorke juga telah dikutip di antara penyanyi terbesar dalam sejarah musik populer: tahun 2005, dari sebuah jajak pendapat yang diselenggarakan oleh Blender dan MTV2 Yorke terpilih sebagai 18 penyanyi terbesar sepanjang masa, dan pada tahun 2008 ia menduduki peringkat ke-66 diRolling Stone ".

Musik dan Karakteristik Suara Yorke

Yorke yang dikenal memiliki suara tenor yang khas, vibrato, dan jugasering menggunakan suara buatan bernada tinggi, dan kemampuan untuk mencapaidan mempertahankan catatan rentang vokal lebar. Selama sesi rekaman untuk Thedegree pada tahun 1994, Yorke kemudian mengatakan konser yang berdampak langsung pada vokalnya pada lagu "Fake PlasticTrees" Namun, Yorke mengatakan, "Suara cantik saya ini sangat mengganggu dan perkataan sopanpun bisa saya ungkapkan dengan melengking ". Dia juga sering mengadopsi gaya lain menyanyi, seperti gaya berteriak agresif di bagian tengah". Paranoid Android " dan gaya seperti orang bicarapada lagu " Myxomatosis "dan" A Wolf at the Door".

Selain menjadi vokalis dan menulis lirik, kontribusi musik Yorke untuk Radiohead termasuk dalam permainan gitar, baik akustik dan listrik (band biasanya bagian irama, dengan anggota Jonny Greenwood menjadi pemimpin), dan piano (termasuk piano Rhodes, terutama pada Kid A). Dia juga memainkan gitar bass pada kesempatan (garis bass untuk "The National Anthem" direkam oleh dia) serta drum. Selama tur 2006 dan 2008 ia melakukan perkusi di panggung bersama-sama dengan drummer Phil Selway pada lagu "Bangers & Mash ".

Yorke, tidak seperti anggota lain dari Radiohead, belum pernah belajar bagaimana membaca musik. Dia berkata, "Jika seseorang meletakkan catatan di depanku itu tak berarti, karena bagi saya anda tidak dapat mengekspresikan irama yang benar seperti itu. Ini adalah cara yang tidak efektif untuk melakukannya dan sangat merepotkan ".

Sejak album 'Kid A', Radiohead melalui Yorke, telah memasukkan banyak unsur musik elektronik ke dalam pekerjaan mereka. Akibatnya, Yorke telah memprogram dan membuat sampel pada laptopnya di album terbaru. Pada acara radio tahun 2003 untuk mempublikasikan album 'Hail to the Thief', Yorke mengatakan bahwa ia lebih suka membuat catatan hanya dengan komputer dibandingkan dengan hanya sebuah gitar akustik.

Dalam wawancara Yorke telah mengutip berbagai inspirator musik yang mempengaruhinya, antara lain komposer jazz dan bassis Charles Mingus, Neil Young, Miracle Legion, penyanyi Scott Walker, dan musik elektronik seperti Aphex Twin dan Autechre, Krautrock dan Can Band. Talking Heads, Queen, Joy Division, Majalah, Elvis Costello, The Smiths dan Sonic Youth adalah band yang berpengaruh awal pada Radiohead dan Yorke. Pada tahun 2004, di Coachella Valley Music and Arts Festival, Yorke berkata kepada orang banyak, "Ketika saya masih kuliah, Pixies dan REM mengubah hidup saya," dan dia telah sering disebut-sebut kedua band sebagai contoh.

Yorke Sebagai Aktivis

Yorke telah blak-blakan tentang berbagai isu-isu politik dan sosial kontemporer. Radiohead telah membaca buku 'No Logo' by Naomi Klein selama sesi 'Kid A', "No Logo" juga sempat dianggap sebagai judul album dan semua anggota dikabarkan sangat dipengaruhi oleh itu, meskipun Yorke mengatakan "tidak mengajarkan apa pun. "Yorke juga menjadi aktivis dalam mendukung praktek perdagangan yang adil, dengan anti-WTO (World Trade Organization) dan sikap anti-globalisasi, turut mengecam IMF (International Monetery Fund), yang mengumpulkan perhatian signifikan di tahun 2000-an.

Yorke juga terkenal sebagai seorang aktivis politik dan juga aktivis hak asasi manusia dan gerakan anti-perang seperti Jubilee 2000, Amnesty International, dan Friends of the Earth's Big Ask Campaign. Radiohead bermain di 'Free Tibet' pada tahun 1998 dan 1999 dan di sebuah konser Amnesty International pada tahun 1998. Pada tahun 2005, Yorke juga bergabung di 'Trade Justice Movement'. Pada tahun 2006, Jonny Greenwood dan Yorke melakukan konser khusus untuk Friends of the Earth. Yorke menjadi berita utama di tahun yang sama karena menolak permintaan Perdana Menteri Tony Blair bertemu dengan dia untuk membahas perubahan iklim, Yorke menyatakan Blair tidak memiliki kredibilitas terhadap lingkungan. Yorke kemudian bersikap kritis terhadap penggunaan energi sendiri terhadap musiknya. Radiohead melakukan sebuah studi oleh kelompok 'Best Foot Forward' yang mengklaim untuk membantu mereka memilih tempat dan metode transportasi yang sangat mengurangi penggunaan karbon pada tur 2008 mereka. Band ini juga memanfaatkan sistem pencahayaan LED yang hemat energi dan membudayakan daur ulang plastik.

Thom Yorke mendukung film dokumenter perubahan iklim, 'The Age of Stupid'. Dia menyumbangkan lagu radiohead yang berjudul 'Reckoner' untuk kredit akhir film dan melakukan streaming video pada 'The Age of Stupid Global Premiere'. Selama itu Thom Yorke berbicara tentang masalah pertumbuhan ekonomi dan mengatakan "Saya pikir Ed Miliband mungkin tahu ini tapi tidak akan mengakuinya sebagai politisi biasa. Itulah konsep pertumbuhan ekonomi tak terbatas dan sekarang mati "

Mati rasa

Ternyata memang lebih mudah menumpahkan rasa lewat tulisan.
Saya mempunyai masalah dengan kepercayaan pada orang lain.
saya tidak tau, siapa yang bisa saya percaya,hanya untuk sekedar mendengarkan curhatan saya yang isinya keluhan semua. saya bukan tipe orang pengeluh..tapi kali ini saya benar-benar berada di titik galau yang ingin meledak.

beberapa orang yang kenal mengenal saya mencibir dan prihatin melihat saya.
"apa saja yang kamu lakukan seharian kalau tidak ada acara manggung akustik? cuma diam di kamar? melamun di depan komputer?mendengarkan lagu sedih tapi tidak ada air mata yang keluar dari mata kamu? "
saya tersenyum.
dalam hati saya cuma bisa berkata " saya memang seperti ini, bukan saya anti sosial dan tidak punya kehidupan lain di luar,tapi bagi saya, mengasingkan diri dari kehidupan luar yang penuh kepalsuan itu lebih baik. tentu saya juga ingin seperti kalian,tapi saya mungkin sudah terpola menjadi pribadi penyendiri, kalian boleh menyebut saya orang aneh. Tapi jika kalian tau semua yang pernah saya lalui, mungkin kalian akan mengerti"

saya punya banyak teman, mereka menyayangi saya, mereka mengagumi saya. salah satu dari mereka pernah bilang " I wish I were you "
saya tertawa, apa kamu benar-benar ingin menjadi saya? dan dia menjawab "tentu saja, kamu sosok wanita yang menginspirasi saya, kamu berbakat, kamu cantik, kamu pintar,kamu wanita tangguh,kamu penuh dengan canda tawa, penuh dengan humor,dan kamu penuh dengan rasa kasih dan para pria menginginkan kamu untuk menjadi kekasih mereka"

saya bersyukur Allah SWT memberikan saya kelebihan dalam bidang musik. Musik adalah hidup saya.Dan musik yang memberikan saya Hidup. Untuk dalam jangka yang lama, saya percaya, The Good thing about music is, when it hits you, you feel no pain. NO PAIN.
Saya bangga pada diri saya ketika mereka menamakan diri mereka fans saya. dan menikmati karya-karya saya. tanpa disadariItu salah satu yang membuat saya belajar mencitai hidup dan diri saya.
Saya memang penuh dengan selera humor. hanya itu yang bisa menghibur diri saya sendiri.
Beberapa pria menginginkan saya untuk menjadi kekasih mereka? Benar. Tapi semuanya ternyata terlahir hanya untuk mencari tau apa itu cinta,mereka tidak tau caranya mencinta.
Karena sekarang saya tau, hanya sedikit pria yang lahir ke bumi ini dengan hati.

Lalu, ada seseorang yang bertanya pada saya "kenapa kamu sangat dingin?apa kamu tidak merasa kesepian?Mengapa kamu sangat pemilih?mengapa kamu terlalu tidak percaya dan ketakutan untuk membuka hati lagi?"

saya tersenyum kembali,
Boys, I'm not picky, I'm not paranoid...I just have trust issues
dalam hati saya berkata

Dan mereka bilang saya mati rasa.
Salah.
meskipun hati saya sering dipermainkan. Disakiti. Dibohongi. tapi hati saya masih berfungsi dengan baik untuk memberi cinta.

Mungkin dengan kesendirian ini saya bisa lebih memahami dan menemukan jawaban kenapa saya selalu di sakiti.

Emotionally I died A long Time Ago

Sometimes there is nothing to say. Just take a deep breath and walk away.
but there's always, some "why" in our life remain unanswered.

How come it has to be the one person you love the most, is also the one person who can hurt you the most..?
Everyone told me to open up and trust again, and when I do, I get hurt again. What's the point?

my head is screaming 'WHO CARES', but my heart is screaming 'I DO'

The heart may forgive, but the head never forgets.
I'm tired of laughing when i just want to cry. I'm tired of smiling when i want to die. I say I'm fine when I'm not, All i want is for the pain to stop.

I know, I know
it sounds lame.
but trust me, it hurts like hell !!


but
If being hurt makes me stronger,
I should be unbreakable...

Disappointed

Life is like a big puzzle. Some of the pieces just don't fit where you want them to, no matter how hard you try to make them.


I can't blame you for being who you are, I can only blame myself for thinking you were different.
Soon my heart will acknowledge what my head already knows...that you're not worth it.